Regrets, I've had a few

There are a few things in life I would do over if I could... I'm sure we all have them. Some of my do-overs would include: my wedding day ( not the groom, just the day and the dress) about two thirds of my high school days and ALL of my junior high days. The one do-over I would like to address today is a comparitively small one-- The Funeral Outfit. I cringe to even think of it, some sixteen years later.
My paternal grandmother died very suddenly at the age of 75 in the early 1990's. My little sister would know exactly what year, I seem to think was January 1990, which would put me smack dab in the middle of my aforementioned junior high days. But it does not forgive the outfit I wore to her funeral. My parents were the kind of people who never really had much of an opinion of our clothing, except when we spent too much money on them, as there were eight of us. But as to choosing our own outfits, I had been doing that pretty much since I could dress myself. This served me pretty well until junior high when I all of a sudden went to a school with the most preppy kids you can imagine... thus my creative outfitting days were over. But when I went to the funeral I didn't have my peers to influence me as to what I put on. I don't know who my influence was, but I somehow got ahold of a short black skirt with a slit in the front, a button down white blouse, and black high heels. It sounds harmless, but add BRIGHT red lipstick, ultra boofy hair, and trunky legs and I looked like an overweight preteen trying to look like a forty year old sexy career girl. I 'm sorry to say that about myself, but so it was. I SO long to go back to that morning and tell my thirteen year -old self to reconsider and put on that floral Laura Ashley cordouroy dress I had hanging in my closet, and show some respect for my grandmother. What was I thinking? And I knew the whole day I had made the wrong choice, it isn't something I was ignorant of until later. I saw my family's confused looks, I don't think my uncle has forgiven me to this day ( I attribute his indifference it to the outfit) The funny thing is, no one said anything about it, which made it even worse. It would have been bearable if they had teased me or something, but their silence made me feel so Ashamed.

To tell you the truth, I was sort of invisible in my family, so no one probably even noticed at all...(sniff, sniff)

Maybe I wore it to get their attention.

Gratitude for Tuesday:
1/ That I could get close enough to a hawk on my walk to hear his wings flapping ( they are so elusive)
2/That I could sleep the entire day away
3/that the snow finally stopped ( it's april, already!)
4/that I have friends where there were no friends before
5/I can't think of a fifth... I am sort of sad today